Hydrangea
by Lilacnightmares
Summary: Two sides of the same coin but very much unlike the other; One seemingly coy and the decidedly sadistic. It's such a shame that she cannot stop her desire for either of them. She is caught between two loves and the decision she has to make will settle not only her fate but their fates as well. Lila... Saeran... Ray... they are the spark in an endless wildfire that refuses to die.
1. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER ONE**

With Ray, everything was like an intoxicatingly sweet candy laced with something that needed closer inspection upon consumption; It was the delight of a first time and the need to satisfy forevermore dominated your taste buds in such a way that its mark could not be forgotten. An overwhelming fantasy that one could simply lose themselves into without so much as a second thought of anything else as the allure of this temptation could not be denied.

Ray is hesitant.

He fears making the wrong choice, fears doing the incorrect gesture, and most of all, he fears the idea that he may inadvertently harm her when all he wanted was to ensure her pleasure.

Never his own. Oh, no, no. His worth mattered not. The Savior had drilled that into his head for ions. All he craved, for now, was the satisfaction that came from ensuring somebody else's pleasures. Now, he has a person that he wishes to please at every waking moment, and it's all he's ever wanted. Whatever she wants is what he wants.

Why would he ever stop to think about what he wants when he can fulfill all of her desires instead?

Ray would never stop to think about his pleasure, how much he wanted her, how he longed to have her hand in his own, how he craved the feeling of her soft lips pressed against his own, and just how desperate the insatiable need growing in his loins cried out for the smallest, gentlest caress of a hand against it.

It was a very rare time when he was free from the binds of his work and he had a moment to do something besides defending Magenta and ensuring the encrypted status of the messenger. He found himself headed straight to the room that he had personally painstakingly crafted just for her pleasure.

It was early in the morning and the sunlight was just kissing the horizon enough that dawn peaked over the mountain's edge and breathed light onto a new day, and he didn't expect her to be awake, but she was, and it was as if she were waiting for him to arrive without even having to be forewarned.

Well, she knew he was coming this time. She was the one who begged him to come here in spite of the fact he was already going to see her first. However, Lila was always in tune to know when he was coming.

She always sprung to attention.

Lila smiled at him and beckoned him to come closer with a wave of her hand. His heart was beating out of his chest but he listened to her alone, and not the alarms in his body that told him not to get too close. She pulls him down onto the bed next to her and takes his face in her hands. Her touch is so very gentle and he's long so imagined what it would feel like to have her hands touch his bare skin.

It's electric… It's warm… and it's pulling him into a state of disrepair that he cannot ignore.

She kisses him without any warning. She is soft and inviting, and her lips taste faintly of strawberry gloss.

He is haphazard, clumsy, and unsure of what to do when all he's learned is thrown out the window the instant he is in her presence physically. He's laid out at his desk before, shutting his eyes and long imagining what it would feel like to have her there with him, what it would look like to have her lips wrapped around his cock, and what it would sound like as she swallowed him whole.

This is nothing compared to the real thing. No, a mere fantasy cannot compare to Lila in person. All it takes is a simple peck for him to feel a rise in his jeans. Her hands let him go free and rest against his thighs, oh so very close to his need, and she takes one small glance at him and smiles a knowing smile.

That knowing smile quickly turns into an amused grin as her palm rests against the bulge in his pants. Ray can't hold back his gasp that leaves his lips. His knee-jerk reaction is to run, but she wants him.

"I thought you had your fill when we spoke on the phone last night," she teases him. "Guess I was wrong."

His cheeks burn hotly.

He couldn't help himself. He knew that it was wrong of him to take care of his problems while she was speaking to him but his wants had gotten far too hard for him to bear lately. Ray swallows, nervous about what she may next. If she was going to push him away or scoff at his childish actions.

"I… um… you knew…?"

"Oh, it wasn't that hard to figure out, Ray. No offense, but nobody can hide whimpers like that. I don't mind… I'm happy that you like me. I was just a little peeved that I didn't get to watch is all."

Oh.

Lila's eyes twinkle with something that he's never quite seen before in her eyes, but he knows that gaze, he knows the words she's whispered to him when nobody was watching, and he knows what she's written to him on the messenger without a care in the world to stop her.

He isn't sure what to say.

But, by God, if he doesn't want this moment to end.

"Ray," His name against her lips comes out like a tiny plea. It's small, desperate, fraught with need. She does not need to say it. He knows. He knows what she wants.

He wants her too.

Ever since he first saw her face, her smile, her laugh, her personality, her empathy, her meticulous compassion, her longing for happiness, her everything… he could not deny that he craves her touch. That would be a lie. All he's wanted since he met her was for her to want him just as much.

His hands have the smallest tremble to them as he reaches out and lets his hands rest against her hips.

That's when he finally noticed she's hardly wearing enough to cover up her torso, much less her legs, and as his hands brush against her curves, she lets out the smallest contented sigh that makes his heart nearly stop. Lila's gone and done that on purpose, he hadn't even been aware that she had something so tiny in her wardrobe.

His green eyes flicker down once, and then he returns his gaze to her face as if looking for consent. Rather than respond to him verbally, she firmly takes hold of his hand and slides it against her abdomen until his nervous digits are damn near pressed against her nethers.

"I feel the same way," she whispers. "I need you."

He stills, and then slowly, he nods his head as his confidence grows. That's all that she needed to say to him. His need for her praise and his desperation to make her happy outweigh his hesitancy to perform. He fears ruining what they have but from the way that she looks at him, he decides that this is okay.

She leans forward to steal a kiss from his lips and that is the point where he can never return from.

It isn't that she needs him.

It's him that desperately needs her.

He takes the time to lower her back down against the bed with a small push before separating from her kiss, and as her back collides with the mattress, she stares up at him through hair that covers her slightly surprised expression; That only grows as his hands explore her body.

He pauses as his hands reach the unexplored territory.

A gloved hand easily slides underneath her gown until his palm is pressed against her breast, and as his fingers roll and twist her nipple, she let out a small moan. She's at his mercy at that moment and he feeds into every sound she makes, touching, caressing, feeling her form.

One hand rests against her hip and runs up and down the length of her inner thighs, while he feels her attempt to squish her legs together. He stops that quickly, grip firm enough to keep her from thrashing about. Her breath is quickened, and her heart is beating so fast he can hear it .

Satisfied with her reactions, but wanting much more noise and reaction, he makes eye contact with her and smirks.

Ray is always hard to read.

One moment he's nervous and the next he takes charge and refuses to quit. It's a hairpin trigger and from her expression, it's obvious she's enthralled with it, with him. Ray can't stop the chuckle that leaves his lips. It's actually cute that she does daring things and then backpedals to a shy expression.

It gives him the advantage to feel important and useful.

Before long, her top is discarded and across the room on the floor leaving her in nothing but her panties.

Oh, but those are in his way and they need to go as well.

Her cheeks are tinged with pink, brown eyes darting to the side as she sucks in a nervous breath. Lila is aware of his intentions, and she is more than happy to lift her hips and give him the space to rip those from her hips and send them down to the ground. Ray has to wait a moment as he takes in the view of her body in full view. His eyes scan over everything that he can see in the faint glow of the morning sunlight from the window. She's lovely, she's beautiful, and she's more heavenly then he had even imagined in his fantasies. This is a rare sight for somebody as lowly as him and insignificant as he is; Ray wants to map out every inch and centimeter of her form to memory.

"Beautiful…" he breathes, the word coming out in a low voice as he sat in awe of her for what must have been the hundredth time. "Better than any rose."

It never did get old, though, he was just as impressed this time as he had been the first time that she smiled at him on day one.

"...Ray," she whispered his name. It drew his attention away and back onto her face, Lila was chewing at her lower lip, as she often did when she was nervous. He loves it, the way that she is the one floundering to say find the words to say instead of him.

He pressed a finger to her lips. "Shh… shh. Let me worship you, princess. You don't deserve any less."

"But, what about yo…."

Ray shook his head as if he expects her to deny that, and then he gives Lila no time to say anything more to him. He leans down, brushing his lips against her own, it's brief, but that's only because he's determined to kiss every inch. He moves from her lips to her cheek, to her throat, to her collarbone, to her chest, to her abdomen, to her hips, all the down the crook of her body until he's face to face with her folds.

With one hand, he spreads her legs wide. He knows that she's whispering something from above him but he's dead set on making her squeal and moans instead; Leaning over next, he slips his tongue between her lips and relishes in the sensation.

It's intoxicating as he drinks her in.

Everything about her is driving him wild, but right now isn't about him, this is about her needs. Her needs came first. Her form smells faintly of what he believes is a blend of strong notes, pomegranate, and white Jasmine to be specific, a clash of sweet and earthy notes that make him shudder in delight.

Somehow, it was even stronger tonight.

Just his luck. The heavens shined down upon him just this one time.

Ray delighted in the sounds of her cries, and the further in he flicked his tongue against her quivering heat, the more her voice sang into his eardrums. He isn't sure of his technique but he learns as he acts and the more her body quakes, the more he applies that specific action.

The hand that holding her down was quick to slick between her upper folds until it located her clit. One precise twist of his fingers and she is sent screaming. She responds by digging her hands into his once neat hair, fists tight on his tufts of white locks with the one thing that she can control in this situation.

Her body withers, shaking hard and fast, pressing back against his touch in desperation at every stroke and pull he makes.

Ray is happy with himself for once in his life.

He's the one responsible for her pleasure.

"So… good… Ray, please…"

Lila is starting to grow desperate and she's lost track of the time in the blur of passion. Her pleads are nonsensical, but he knows that she feels good. She's said that more times than he can count and really, the praise from Lila is all he ever needs in this life.

Ray doesn't budge from his spot as her juices begin to seep out and coat his face. She's so damn sweet, he thinks he might drink her dry if this keeps up. With one stroke of his tongue against her clit, she trembled in need.

He's not screwing up, no, he's doing everything right as far as he can tell. He's damn happy about it, and he refuses to hide it.

"Ray, wait ," her body seizes.

She can feel that familiar sensation of heat and tension building in her loins and there's no way to fight it as it's grown far too much. It's starting to flood every single inch of her body. It just feels so good that it brings tears to her eyes.

Ray knows better than to stop. She can't tap out that easy. No, no, it's obvious that she wants more but is too embarrassed to admit it. He sucks hard on the little bundle of nerves at her core and smothers her folds in unashamed kisses until she finally can't take the heat any longer —

She cums without much beyond a stuttered warning from her mouth. His name is hot against her lips, an enraptured plea of thankful unadulterated bliss that he is more than happy to witness. He doesn't stop until her body stops quivering and shaking, not until her chest is fraught long breaths to try and regain the oxygen she lost, and her brown eyes glisten with need and desire.

Ray pulls away from her bottom and catches a glimpse of her splayed out in front of him. She is dazed, poised, and a little out of it. However, she is satisfied, and that's what he wanted.

The two of them share a look. The sincere compassion in her eyes makes his stomach flop. Although, it turns into a bit of fluster when he raised his hand to his lips and sucked the lingering taste of her fluids from her fingers. She glanced away for a moment and then looks back, beckoning him forward.

He obliges, giving her his hand so that she can pull herself back into an upright position, but she clutches onto him as not to fall back over from the sheer exhaustion.

She pulls in him close enough that she can murmur into his ear. "I love you," she whispers as if it were a secret she wished to hold close to her heart alone. "I love you, Ray."

"I love you too…" his heart says.

Ray meant that.

All of a sudden, there shared stupor was broken by the sound of a text message buzzing. He glanced down at his pocket, and he didn't have to check it to know that it was the Savior. She would let him take breaks but not for as long as she let him believe, and today… he was grateful that he had this long. He just wanted to stay. It was obvious that she still wanted more but they both knew that his break was going to be short-lived. He couldn't stay away long from his work. It was a shame, really, because he didn't want to leave her either. He wanted to do so much more with Lila.

Her hand lingered against his cheek. "Next time, you're going to let me take care of you, okay?"

His lips curl into a smile at those words. He's made her happy. He's made her happy! It's all that he's wanted, and now... now she was his, with the utmost certainty. It was all that he wanted. He was important to her, she saw meaning and worth in him. Next time…? Oh… there was going to the next time! He thought with excitement. Ray hadn't expected her to say that to him but now that he knew with a guarantee that she wanted him as much as he wanted her all this time? Oh, there was no stopping him.

At least, that's what he thought.


	2. Chapter 2

**Saeran: I know you aren't doing anything in there, so I expect you to be awake when I come for you. **

**Wisteria: But…**

**Wisteria: I never know when you're coming. **

**Wisteria: How am I supposed to know, then?**

**Saeran: Then I suppose you better not go to sleep at all, toy. **

**Saeran: Got it? **

**Saeran: I won't repeat myself. **

**Saeran: When I say something, I expect it to be followed. **

**Saeran: When I want something, I get it. **

**Saeran: Understood? **

**Wisteria: ...**

**Saeran: I thought so. **

**Saeran has left the chatroom.**

With Saeran, everything was a bittersweet melody against pounding against your eardrums that made your entire body quake and balance go haywire and the bitter afternote left one reeling and confused as to what had become of the first few seconds of sweet.

The taste of powerful sugar is long but gone as the candy has dissolved, and all that remains is this sour burn against the back of your throat that refuses, no, demands to be recognized as something entirely different.

And?

Saeran wastes no time.

Why would he? He knows what he wants and he's going to take it, no questions asked and no if, ands, or buts about it. If you take the time to beat around the bush and waste all your precious energy that could have been allocated to more important means if it weren't wasted on useless means? Then, all you are is a useless fodder for the cannon.

He knows about what he wants.

He knows what he craved and not for a fucking second does he play coy or deny it. He stares at the person in their eyes and makes his presence known by growling and hissing his desires. It should be as simple as that and nothing more beyond that should ever be bothered with.

Why ever would he waste his time trying to make somebody like him when they already desire him in a manner like this?

Saeran is the strongest person in this entire place and that means something that nobody should ever dare question his might.

It's late into the night when the moon is high when he finds himself storming down the hallways and corridors as he makes a beeline for her room.

Well, it's more like his toy box. She doesn't hold any claim to anything anymore as she belongs to him. She should be damn grateful for that because if he didn't want to claim her then the Savior would toss her into the basement. It would have been that swift and that simple when it came down to it and he wanted to laugh when she didn't fall to her knees and praise him.

Saeran is the one that's finally gone and taken everything that he's ever wanted to have.

Lila belongs to him and Ray is long but gone. He has those bastards on their toes for hours now, and it's only a matter of time until he can destroy every single one of them. He's earned a momentary reprieve from the RFA as they seemingly had stepped away from their system.

That bastard is distracted by all the other fun games Saeran has played and what will he do with this time that he has? Oh, it's obvious what he's going to do with it, but he's filled with such glee and excitement in his veins that he nearly feels alive again.

The numbness had taken ahold of him while he worked, but just the thought of being in the same room as his toy again on a night such as this made him stand at attention. He needs to feel something and the only way for him to feel the burning sting of power is to kick down his stupid toy until she can't breathe.

He wastes no time banging his fist against the door, no, he merely forces it open and slams it hard behind himself. Lila had already heard him coming because she was sitting upright in bed and her brown eyes were wide.

She hurriedly patted down her hair to make herself presentable despite her mess and swallowed, remembering to breathe only after she met his gaze. Like a deer in headlights, she couldn't turn her attention from him.

"Saeran," her voice cracks.

Oh, he likes hearing the sound of her voice coated in fear and unease. Saeran shouldn't have to say anything to make this girl come to him from across the room. He doesn't need words for this. She doesn't need words for this. They don't need words for this.

It's already settled without having to make the matter known or repeated. She should, no, she does know by now what to expect from him and she knows better than to turn her head at him.

That's why she damn near scrambles to her feet but he stops by meeting her halfway and knocking her back down against bed with a firm shove. She stumbles back against the bedspread as her hair fans her face and the fabric of her skirt balloons up her legs, revealing a bit of her thighs to him that had once been hidden.

"Now, now, don't get into a big hurry, toy," his eyes met her own as he chuckled. "I know you must be trembling with excitement to see my face again. It's not a surprise to anyone. Are you feeling lonely in your toy box since nobody but me can come and go to be with you? I get it. I understand you. You're excited about being able to be useful for the first time in what must be forever."

His lips are curled in a snide smirk. He leans over her form and she doesn't try to thrash or squirm away from him. She just waits and watches to see what he's going to do today.

All Lila can do is gaze up at him as he continues to speak, "Who can blame you? While you failed to do even the simplest of tasks, all of your failures were given to me to correct and undo by the Savior. I've been doing that the entire time you've been sitting in here, doing nothing but waiting for me to return here. I've nearly destroyed them in two days, my finger is just itching against the trigger to be gone with them once and for all. All my tireless work will mean something."

"I haven't seen you in days, Saeran," was the first thing to come out of her stupid mouth. "Have you been working that hard this entire time? It's been I don't know… almost a week? Have you stopped to get some sleep at all?"

Lila's gaze rested on his form but not meeting his eyes just yet. She's not acknowledging anything else that he's said. The fear left her eyes and was replaced with concern.

Disgust crossed his face as soon as those words left her lips. Yet, he was going to lean into this to see where it was going as she didn't often fall into her little traps, no, she would often just listen to whatever he was saying while looking so plainly at him.

What was playing at and why did she think she had a right to do it?

What was she pretending to be?

How dare she think she could trick him?

This game of comfort and compassion was a luxury that was given to Ray. Did she think that she could play a game of pretend with him right now?

Saeran glowers down at Lila, his fist slamming down against the bedspread by her head. He gripped at it tightly, "Do you think that you can sway me by acting as if you care about me? You don't care about me. The only person you cared about was your precious Ray. He's gone, remember?"

Lila stiffened. It didn't matter how many times he brought it up, every single time she heard his name, her face got a little sadder and wearier.

Her constitution was easily shaken out of hand when he pushed back. Lila could talk big and pretend that nothing had changed all she wanted but he knew what she was thinking and every monster that she scared of.

She shook her head, curls were strewn about as she did so, "That's not at all—"

Saeran didn't want to hear her excuses.

She sounds like a broken record that's chittering underneath the hook and it keeps scratching. Who would want to listen to the broken melody of a dying bluebird, anyway? Such an ugly song that grinds against his gears!

He pressed a hand to her lips, the free one, and the sounds of her words were muffled and quieted down for a second when she realized he wasn't going to give her room to speak. She tried to say more but it was muddled underneath his hand.

It was nonsensical. She had to give up. She always had to give up to Saeran, and that was the way that he wanted it to be.

Good, he had half a mind to gag her one of these days but he liked hearing her beg more then he liked hearing her silence. It died down after a moment when she realized that she wasn't going to get anywhere with that.

"Let's not waste our time with that stupid, moronic, and worthless little song and dance of yours. I didn't come here to hear you put on a play for me and have your fun. This is about my fun. I've spent far too long working and covering up for you to hear anything but gratitude coming from your mouth tonight." Saeran says, his voice darkening.

Lila's eyes are something that bothers him the most.

There's just something about them that fills his chest with something that he doesn't understand. He doesn't know if he wants more of it or if he wants to destroy it. Yet, it's the window to everything that she's thinking and feeling. Tentative, she's trying to search his face for an explanation of sorts.

He removes his hand from her mouth after that. She says nothing. Saeran rips his gaze away from her own and turns his attention back to her body below him.

She's wearing far too many layers for him to be pleased with the situation. She's always been a dress-up doll that Ray could do as he pleased but Saeran had damn sure to get rid of those as much as he could to ensure that she couldn't hide behind layers of tulle.

Lila's wearing a tight black dress with a thick sweater draped over her shoulders to cover up her arms and most of her torso. He's already been given the delightful luxury of seeing the way her clothes can fit so snuggly around her hips.

He smirks at the way that she trembles as his fingers trail from her the knock of her knees all the way to her inner thighs.

"Mmm, remembering when you got Ray to do anything that you wanted? Is that why you're breathing so hard? You're thinking about what he did to you?" he taunts, seemingly knowing why she would feel so unnerved by his hands toying with her body.

His hand slides deeper and deeper until his palm rests flatly against her innermost core. It's emitting warmth underneath his touch. He doesn't even need to move a single digit to draw a gasp out of her quivering lips.

"Such a needy toy, aren't we?"

"N-No…"

It had only been a few weeks ago that she guided Ray's hands against every sensitive part of her body with relative ease. It was a bit hazy for Saeran to retrieve the memory that belonged to Ray but he could see flashes of it if he strained hard enough to get a peak.

How her voice turned into raspy pants filled to the brim with desire and need, how she came unglued from the smallest of touches, how she begged and pleaded with Ray to spoil her body rotten, and how she looked into his eyes with such compassionate and kissed him with fever for treating her like she was some royalty.

Promising him that she would take care of him the next time that they were together?

Disgusting.

Hilarious, though, that she would never have been able to keep such a promise when that boy had never existed in the first place. Oh, but, perhaps she could channel that needy energy to something more deserving of it? Saeran is struck with an idea at that moment and it fills his entire body with intense vigor.

"Your body betrays you, princess." Saeran corrects her with a chuckle. He can feel her struggling with herself. "As a matter of fact, I think your body has betrayed you countless times, wouldn't you say? Isn't that why you were so willing to let me kiss you? Or was it because you thought it would bring your precious Ray back?"

Her bottom lip is tucked underneath her top row of teeth as she tries to quiet herself. That's adorably pathetic of his toy. Oh, is the poor thing ashamed of herself? It makes Saeran want to throw his head back and laugh at her pitiful expression.

"Or," Saeran's voice lowers to a whisper as he sinks his fingers underneath the sheer fabric of her panties. There's the telltale sign of wetness coating her slick. "Is it because you were thinking about all of the things that I could do to you?"

Lila suddenly seizes, and her entire body tenses. She's been trying to avoid his gaze for the longest time but she turns her head and finds him leaning over her from mere inches from her face. He can see her grasp at the blankets to try and keep control of herself but she's never been good at keeping herself in one piece.

"It could be very easy, you know?" he reminds her with a simple press of his fingers. It took no time to find that bundle of nerves hidden in her folds. He's not even bothered to mess around. He sees the prize and there's no turning his attention away from it. His nimble fingers roll her clit back and forth between themselves.

"Saeran..." Lila whispers, it's so quiet that it barely registers in her ears. It sounds like a plea of sorts and swells his pride. "Please…"

He wants to hear that. Saeran wants to hear her gasping his name against her names to erase that memory of Ray. That bug had similar thoughts but he had been too much of a scaredy-cat to take what he wanted. Saeran has spent a lot of time thinking about all the ways that he wants to have her sprawled out before him.

He can imagine it right now.

Her creamy lips wrapped around his cock as he mercilessly fucks her mouth and throat until her voice is nothing but a raspy whimper. How he could chain her up with binds against the headboard and fuck her tight cunt until she's begging and pleading for him to let her cum. How easy it could be to spread her legs from behind and fuck her until she didn't know what to do with herself.

He's thought about taking hold of her curly locks to yank her around. Those brown eyes of hers would be looking at him with such intensity that just the thought of seeing her face in such a lewd and needy expression makes his pants feel even tighter right then.

Saeran's fingers glided up and down her wetness but he would not give her the satisfaction of his fingers curled up inside of her heat.

"You would be lying to yourself if you said that you hadn't thought about it. I know you've thought about it," his taunts continue to berate Lila. "After all, you wouldn't be so forthcoming right now if you hadn't thought about how much better I am than that airhead. The sweet little princess has some very dirty thoughts, doesn't she?"

Lila tries to hide it, but he sees that look in her eyes.

Saeran takes hold of her chin in his free hand and yanks her attention back onto him. She stares at him with those widened eyes. There's a glimmer of desire inside of them that he's seen before in his shared memories.

His commands are simple, "Say it."

Her chest rose and fell but there was no response.

Fine, he decides. If she wants to play the hard way with him then he's going to drag the answer out of her fucking mouth if it's the last thing that he does. His hand leaves her hanging just as simple as that and he removes it from her panties. Against whatever strength she has, Lila lets out a little whine in response to this.

These clothes need to go, he thinks.

Her panties are discarded and thrown out of the way since that's the closest thing that he has within his grasp. The next thing that he does is yank her into an upright position and her sweater is hastily peeled from her shoulders and sinks around her torso. Lila removes it for him, and he chuckles in response to her eagerness.

Saeran brushes her hair out of her face with one hand in a short display of tenderness that shows his real intent when he tangles his fingers at the back of her head and pulls her into a kiss. It's one of those kisses that taste like fire. It's like cinnamon sugar on the back of his throat mixed with the strawberry gloss that she wears.

It's anything but gentle. There's tongue, teeth, and biting. There's nothing but the burning intensity from lungs that are grasping at straws for breath that won't seem to come. He growls against her lips but she returns the kiss after a moment of hesitation. Her arms slowly but surely wrapped around his shoulders and there was a steady hum.

The kiss was what she was focused on as his hands searched for the zipper on the back of her dress. It slides down with an audible click. That had to go, so, he pulled her back off of him and ordered her to strip. He wasn't going to do all of the work here. She pulled her arms from the top of the dress and slid it down her form until it was all but gone.

Saeran took that time to get rid of his suit jacket and tie to lighten the load of clothes on his own body but he wasn't going to reward her with the sight of himself. He knew that she had wanted to see Ray back then, her fingertips had clutched the edge of his shirt with such desire. Why would he give her that satisfaction?

His gaze lingered on her form as she tried to catch her breath again. There wasn't a lot in the way of marks and bruises on her body.

There was the telltale mark that he had bitten into her skin a few days before mark her as his but apart from that, her creamy skin was all but lacking the much needed purple marks from his hands. Saeran could imagine it and he could also imagine how much satisfaction it would bring him to see her broken.

Ray wanted to treat her like a porcelain doll. He wanted her to stand on a pedestal like a toy so he could imagine her, look, but never touch. He thought about that all day long. He wanted to admire her body like she was a goddess that he was not worthy of. Those thoughts were weak and pitiful. She wasn't like that.

She wanted to throw around like a ragdoll.

It was in her eyes.

You know what? If she wanted it then she needed to prove how far she was willing to push herself for Saeran. He wasn't Ray. He wasn't going to spoil her body with what she wanted. She was going to give him what he wanted. Saeran sat on the bed next to her and beckoned her forward and she crawled on his lap like a good toy.

"Say it," he repeats himself.

Lila met his green eyes, clouded his lust. Her lips parted and yet, she hesitated for a moment before she spoke up again. "I…"

Pathetic.

She sits in his lap with the least amount of control that he's ever seen. All of his and he's barely touched her body at all. Her hands clutch at the fabric of his shirt. Her hips and heat are pressed against the fabric separating his warmth from his own. He knows what she desperately craves but he's not going to give it to Lila.

It's almost cute to watch the way she squirms and grounds against him indignantly. What a little brat, huh?

"If you can't say it," he warns her with a snide sneer. "I'm not going to give you anything you want, princess. I might have pitied you long enough to let you cum but I think I'm starting to prefer that need in your eyes. Maybe we should prolong your satisfaction? After all, you're not the one that deserves to be treated special."

Saeran takes this time to explore her exposed body as he waits.

With one hand he feels the way her back arches against his palms, and the other, he pushes the sheer fabric of her bra out of the way to cup her breast. She's soft and smooth all over. He makes a point of rolling the stiffening bud between his fingers much as he did with her clit moments prior. It draws out a little moan.

"C'mon," he reminds her with his lips pressed against her mark on her throat as she struggles against him for some kind of relief. "If you can get me off like this, then maybe I'll reward you for being a good girl. If you refuse to say what you want then you sure as hell better show me what you want with your entire body, toy. I want to see you come unglued."

She's aching and throbbing against him; Yet, she's willing to lean into his touch despite the way she normally shied away from his touch when he got rough with her body. He's given her no wiggle room to argue but it seems like the last thing she wants to do is turn away from him. Lila draws in a breath and looks up at him as he waits, expectantly.

She isn't sure what to do at first but her pursed lips are delightfully swollen. Saeran watches as she does everything that she can think of without disobeying his explicit orders. Her nails dig into the fabric of the back of his shirt, and her hips rock slowly but surely against his own with the most energy that she can muster.

It's not a lot.

But, watching her squirm and try to pathetically get him off through his clothes is a laughable effort that pleases him. He was already stiff when she started to paw at him and he would not deny in his head that he was easy to touch when he allowed someone the right to do so. His body was just as sensitive as hers was.

"Saeran… Saeran…"

She knows that that is what he craves.

Saeran craves to be recognized as his person. It's the only thing that he's ever craved at the end of the day. She's seen it in his eyes. She's always known that he was not Ray. He was nothing like Ray, and that wasn't a bad thing. He was hurting in his own way and he just wanted someone to see that he was his own person.

He may push her buttons and try to turn his frustration on her when it comes. But, she sees how faraway his gaze looks when he whispers such vitriol. It's like he's saying something but the words are not intended to hurt her, specifically.

Lila isn't sure if she's overthinking it.

All she knows for certain is that she has feelings for him that are just as intense, if not just as strong as the feelings that she has for Ray. It's perplexing and as frustrating and as pent up as her body is feeling, she can't help but to grasp at him and want more and more.

She feels greedy for wanting that.

But, she wishes that she could express to him just how much she longs for him to know that she thinks of him just as she thinks of Ray. She doesn't want to forget her feelings for Ray, and yet, she just wants her warmth for both of them to exist at the same time without worry.

Thinking about all of that weighs on her mind and brings stinging tears to her eyes as she slowly comes undone. Lila's clutching at him so tightly that he can feel her nails leaving indentations in his back. Her breath is heavy as her forehead rests against his shoulder and he can feel the wetness of her tears straining against his shirt.

They're grasping at each other so tightly at that moment.

"Good girl," he musters the courage to offer her the smallest bit of praise for her efforts. He rocks his hips back against her own as his heat rises and rises.

He isn't hiding his grunts that spring up as her intentions get much more determined. His degradation is to be expected, "Look at you, like a bitch in heat… fuck, that airhead coddled you too much. You could have destroyed him if you wanted that bug this badly, hahaha… ngh…! Now, look at you, begging and moaning for me to touch you instead of him."

Her breath hitches and her body starts to shake in his grasps.

"I want you too," her voice is struggling to make a comprehensive sentence. "I want you just as much as I want him, Saeran. Please,"

His hand that had gripped the side of her face tenses.

He isn't sure if he heard what she said right and yet, he feels the coil in his stomach knot up and sends him a warning. Lila lifts her head to look up at him and as soon as those brown eyes fraught with tears look up at him with such need and something else that scares him–

That's what makes Saeran come undone. He cums, without warning, and finds his voice unavailable to him.

The two of them are just staring at each other as the only sound in the room is the shared noise of bated breath.

The whimpers that had been caught in her throat slowly died and she reached up to grasp at his wrist which had been locked in the air as he struggled to discern what to do. It's like he's been caught in the headlights like a terrified deer instead of the princess. She's just looking at him as he gazes back at her form.

Lila stared at Saeran until he let go of her face, shutting her eyes momentary to blink back some of her tears. "I mean it. I care about you, too, Saeran."

Her eyes were fraught with tears as she clung to him of all people. She didn't say anything to him all she did was simply stay where she was. Fingers desperately holding onto him as she buried her face in his neck. Her eyes were shut but she was leaking tears without saying anything.

Saeran's heart begins to race and he cannot focus on anything. He doesn't know what he's doing anymore or why it means what he means. What's he doing? Why is he acting like this? Why does he want to drive this woman into utter madness? Why do those that look in her eyes hold such fondness in sight of the animosity that he has shown her since day one?

He can do nothing but panic.

He tries to glare at her but he can't muster his courage. He isn't sure why but his own face feels wet for some reason.

His voice gets caught in his throat and what would normally sound like a threat doesn't hit the same way, "You're–! You're nothing to me, toy, don't you dare think that this changes anything about us. I don't need you to care about me! I don't care about you! You're nothing but a toy for me to use for my pleasure! You belong to me! You're my toy. You're only my toy!"

"I care about you, Saeran," Lila repeats those dangerous words to him again and again. "I care about Ray too. I care about both of you. I always have. I know you're not the same person. You're both people that I want to protect and love... I love Ray and I love you, Saeran. I love every part of your system so much that it hurts."

She pulls his trembling hand so that it rests against her chest where her heart is pounding like a quickened drum. "There. That's how much I care about you. I know you're hurting just as much as Ray is, and I want to show you that it's okay to care about others. It's not a bad thing. All of this… you make me feel this way, Saeran. Nobody else but you and Ray make me feel this way. Please, let me in, don't shut me out."

Saeran is frightened.

For the first time in his love, he's feeling something apart from the rage and anger that he's always felt for humanity and the rest of the world. He doesn't understand this tenderness nor does he understand how she brings these feelings to him. He needs to get out of this room. It feels like he can't breathe and he doesn't know why this is happening.

He's supposed to be so strong that he only feels the wrath and hatred he's been given.

His job as a person is to destroy everything before it can worm its way inside of his chest but he's made his first mistake. He's allowed someone to crawl inside of his chest without realizing it and his weakness has been shown.

And?

A part of him… wants to believe in those words that she's whispering to him, but the part of him that knows nothing but pain with vulnerability is much stronger than any soft voice inside of the back of his head. Saeran sees nothing but tunnel-vision as he shoves Lila off of him and springs back onto his feet.

If he shows his weakness the world will destroy him again and again. The darkness calls to him and tries to lull him away from the dazzling light of her sunshine but he can feel the darkness starting to melt away from the corners of his heart and it scares the living hell out of him.

She's looking at him with those wide, concerned eyes.

"Saeran…" she says, again.

His heart clenches.

"I won't let you hurt me like this, I won't allow myself to love you, the minute I show weakness is the minute that the strongest is destroyed and I cannot be destroyed, I cannot, I cannot, I cannot," is what he feels like he spats out before he leaves that room as fast as he can.


End file.
